What’s that you say? No time to work out? No problem! Here are two ways to get your sweat on from the comfort of your home, without even trying! None of that bulky equipment necessary.

no equipment

No dvds needed!

no dvds

 

And you guys can finally quit using your, well, this:

infomercial

Although I can’t claim the following exercises are scientifically proven, I have tested both of them personally, and I can tell you they really get the heart rate up.

The first tip comes from years of growing up with parents who set the answering machine on the home phone line to pick up after a total of three rings in a 3-story house.

TIP #1: Get The Phone

Step 1: Pretend you still live in 1996. If you don’t have a home phone line, get one. And insist that people call you on that instead of your cell phone.

Step 2: Set the answering machine on your home phone line to pick up after 3 rings. Three little measly rings. Make sure the only wall-mounted phone with a cord attached is in the kitchen and that none of your cordless phones are ever charged properly.

Step 3: When the phone rings, jump into action like you’re a firefighter and the alarm just went off at the firehouse. Drop whatever you’re doing, leap up and sprint through the house to the kitchen, because otherwise there is no way you’re getting that call. Is that a couch in your way? No time to go around it. Vault yourself over it. If you lose your footing on the dismount, just drop and roll, but remember to tuck your neck. (safety first!) If you’re completely out of breath and wheezing by the time you say ‘hello,’ that just means you’re doing it right.

ferris bueller cameron

The second tip comes from a lifetime of being completely and utterly forgetful.

TIP #2: Lose Your Mind

Step 1: ย Make sure all your important things that you might need during the day such as your wallet, keys, purse, etc are on the top floor of wherever you live.

Step 2: Proceed to exit the house/ apartment/ 5th floor walk-up and forget them all.

Step 3: Go back up the stairs to retrieve them and try leaving the house again. Half-way down the stairs, remember something else you forgot. Turn around and go back up. Try leaving again, and this time get as far as your car. Oh no, did you forget the keys? Perfect, this is where the workout really gets good because now you’re late for work and starting to sweat.

Now RUN back up the stairs, and start quickly lifting heavy things that your keys could possibly be hiding under or behind. Drop to the floor like you’re planking to look for them under the couch. No dice. Spring back up like you’re doing a burpee, then drop down again because you think you see something sparkly. Nope, just some spilled glitter (because of course). Run in panicked circles until you hear your keys jingling in your pocket. Sprint down the stairs and out of your house and don’t stop until you reach the car.

You sweaty yet?

Steve-Martin-Sweat

So there you go, all of the fitness sense with none of the common sense.

What’s your favorite workout that isn’t technically a workout?

 

 

48 Thoughts on “How to Succeed in Fitness Without Really Trying

  1. Hahaha! I love the second one; that is totally me some days :) I love typing; really gets those fingers moving ๐Ÿ˜‰
    Liz @ The Girl on Fire Now recently posted…Character has been builtMy Profile

  2. Love this! Chasing after two little girls is definitely a workout & scooping up the little one right before she drops something in the toilet covers strength training! Hauling the never ending, always brimming laundry basket counts too. And picking up the billion little toys over and over. The list goes on & on….
    Nicole @ Work in Sweats Mama recently posted…Survival Tips for Flying with ChildrenMy Profile

  3. ๐Ÿ˜† You and I share very similar views when it comes to what makes a good, real-world workout. Honestly, the world is my gym and I like to focus on being active in general rather than trying to squeeze all of my daily activity into a condensed workout time-window. Heck, I consider things like all the housework I do on the weekends to be a full-body workout. That routine gets my heart rate up like nothing else…
    Amanda @ .running with spoons. recently posted…. WIAW … this is me .My Profile

    • exactly! its about staying active and moving throughout the day, not sitting for 16 hours a day with 1 hour of really strenuous gym activity. I can’t sit still that long and i cant work that hard for an hour- i like to spread it out :)

  4. Haha this is great. Chasing a wild 13 month old pretty much does it for me! My mouth gets a good workout saying “NO” all o the time too!
    Erin @ Sugar Magnolia recently posted…Seek UpMy Profile

  5. My motto of fitness….I may be crazy but I’m not lazy! Has kept me fit and trim for years!
    carlotta recently posted…The Health Benefits of GratitudeMy Profile

  6. ha! Yes, I am the second one right now…which is making me crazy because I am SUCH a planner. I lay out everything the night before – lunch, clothes, wallet, textbooks, EVERYTHING. Yet, I’m still running up and down my apartment stairs…I think the best time was when I was about to board the bus, three (long) blocks away, and realized I didn’t have my pass. ha!
    Alex @ Brain, Body, Because recently posted…My First Barre ClassMy Profile

  7. Ahhhh!! I totally do that second one all the time unintentionally! I live on the 5th floor and I can’t even begin to tell you how annoying it is when I leave something up there and have to hustle up there to retrieve the forgotten item. Ugh. So lazy sometimes, especially when my hair is did and my dress is on (AKA I’m going out, and the last thing I want to do is run back upstairs.). My favorite activity that’s not technically a workout is taking my dog outside. Six flights of stairs, down and up, every time. Such a treat having a dog…….
    Meghan @ fitnesscrEATures recently posted…Beast ModeMy Profile

    • AH! I lived in a 5th floor walk up for 2 years and if I forgot something up there I would reallllly try to think whether I needed it. if it was raining and i forgot my umbrella- i’d just run to my destination. if it was cold and i forgot my coat- i’d shiver. if i was going to the bar and forgot my ID- YUP i trekked back up :)

  8. This made me laugh SO hard. I’m especially prone to the second one. I forget everything so often, it’s really not funny. AND I’m late everywhere I go, so that just adds to the craziness. Once upon a time, I was halfway down my street and forgot something important to wherever it was I needed to go. I put the car in park, opened the door, and ran back to my house (completely forgetting that, you know, I had a car)…and then ran back to my car. It probably would have been easier, and faster, to you know, drive back to my house…but hey, whatever works, right? :)
    Beth @ Mangoes and Miles recently posted…WIAW #6: kombucha, kind bars, and…kwatermelon?My Profile

    • Hahahaha omg im laughing- that car story is great. i know the feeling though! sometimes you just have it in your head that its faster to run! lol love it :)

  9. OMG…this is hysterical…I love it! The second one is totally me! I constantly forget stuff upstairs or downstairs and have to make several trips sometimes to get everything. Oh it’s sooooo annoying!
    Holly @ EatGreatBEGreat recently posted…WIAW #3My Profile

  10. This definitely had me giggling out loud…I’m at work so hopefully no one noticed ๐Ÿ˜‰
    My built-in workout:
    Step 1. Get an apartment with two floors. Have the kitchen and living room on the first floor, bathroom on the second.
    Step 2. Drink water. Like a ton of it, all the time.
    Step 3. Climb the stairs a million times a day because you have to pee all the damn time.

    Built-in stairclimber ๐Ÿ˜‰
    Sam @ Better With Sprinkles recently posted…WIAW: Getting My Snacking On.My Profile

  11. HAHA! I love this. My favorite workout is taking grocery bags from the car to the house. Everyone knows you have to carry as much bags as possible in one trip so there’s your weight lifting. And then the multiple trips back and forth add some cardio to it! ๐Ÿ˜‰

  12. Hilarious! And I love the Ferris Bueller screen shot aka my favorite movie of all time :)
    Natalie@fit.fun.femme. recently posted…Words of Wisdom WednesdayMy Profile

  13. LOL! My classroom phone is always on the other side of where I am and it’s always a workout for me to jump over stuff left on the floor, dodge children (who usually have their seats pushed all the way back so I run into them and get all bruised up) and make it to the phone before whoever is calling hangs up. Phew!
    Ari @ The Pace of it All recently posted…Sweetness… with a tinge of something.My Profile

  14. So perfect.
    I definitely like to just bring activities into my normal routine as well as some workout and spin classes. Take the stairs, shopping (with heavy shopping bags – duh), and my purse can be heavy too (toned arms in an instant), can’t forget grocery shopping too!
    Lisa recently posted…What I Ate Wednesday โ€“ Mindful Eating?My Profile

  15. I haven’t used a house phone in years! Crazy how fast that became extinct. I do live on the third floor and always find myself schleping up the stairs after I buckle myself with my seatbelt. It’s getting old, I’m telling ya!
    Tara recently posted…Herb Chicken CrockpotMy Profile

    • I know, nobody has home phones anymore! and ah 3 floors up is a trek! especially after you’re already in the car, its hard to motivate all the way back up!

  16. LOL!!! #2 is soooo Me! It’s def. a work out being so forgetful. Its good to know that that’s good for something. ๐Ÿ˜‰
    Koryn @ High Heels & Healthy Alternatives recently posted…WIAW โ€“ What Iโ€™m Lovinโ€™ and What Iโ€™m Thankful forMy Profile

  17. Hilarious! Nothing crazy – but I always take the stairs to get to our 3rd floor apartment instead of the elevator.
    Sara @ Fit.Fun.Femme recently posted…Words of Wisdom WednesdayMy Profile

  18. Hiking hands down!!! Either that or moving… except its not that fun, it just hurts :)

  19. Lol, that’s one way to get a workout! I wouldn’t say I particularly enjoy it, but cleaning my house is a workout because it is two stories and you have up and down and carry the vacuum up and down so it definitely burns some calories!
    Sarah @ Making Thyme for Health recently posted…Roasted Corn & Tomato Naan Pizzas with Burrata CheeseMy Profile

    • i think they’ve actually proved that doing a good house cleaning burns tons of calories! all that up and down the stairs with the supplies, and scrubbing, it adds up!

  20. Love this! I can proudly say that I’ve got suggestion #2 NAILED. I have to have very specific, 100% consistent homes for everything I own, or else it gets sucked into the Vortex of Shiz I Can’t Find But I Have to Leave for Work Right This F*cking Second and Where Are My Keeeeeeeeeyyyyyyys? (And yes, that’s a proper noun.)

    I love the Cameron and Steve Martin pics/gifs, BTW. They’re both such epic wins, I can’t even describe it.
    Lillian @ Seize the Latte recently posted…WIAW: When Horoscopes FailMy Profile

    • Lol, glad i’m not the only one who knows the pain of #2 :) and yay i gotta say, i know the cameron/ steve martin gifs dont exaaaactly fit perfectly (especially the steve martin one) but i had to use them both as soon as i saw them. i was determined to make them fit.

  21. Pretty sure you could package this workout routine and make way more money than that silly buns of steel stuff ๐Ÿ˜‰ Very similar to your second example, my favorite non-exercise exercise is definitely the “Ready to Eat” in which I forget the MANY things I apparently need to eat a meal in comfort (fork? spoon? water? ice? napkin? extra sauce?) and must do approximately 1,000,000,000 squats and stands in order to finally eat. But hey. It makes the meal more rewarding, if not slightly colder ๐Ÿ˜‰ lol
    Chelsea recently posted…WIAW #3My Profile

    • HAHA! omg i know the “ready to eat” one allll too well too! i can never remember like, anything, when it comes to dinner. you’d think i’d never eaten a meal before the way i have to go back and forth to get stuff before i can actually start eating. best call everrrrr!

  22. This is hilarious. Make sure you don’t have caller I.d. Too so if you miss that call you’re screwed!
    Britt @ BrittsRunningStyle recently posted…Healthy HabitsMy Profile

  23. Hahah I laughed out loud at this post. I definitely count cleaning on my non-workout days. I figure using a heavy vacuum counts as cardio and strength! Picking stuff up off the floor? Squats.
    Kelly@KellyRunsforFood recently posted…Healthier Takeout LunchesMy Profile

  24. LOL loved this! I always feel like cleaning is a super workout. Arms, legs, glutes, it does the job : -)
    Meredith recently posted…U.S.A. Bound!My Profile

    • It is!! especially one of those cleaning sessions that you have to like, block out a portion of the day to complete- i really start sweating during some of the scrubbing!

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