So earlier this week I wrote about my conversation with my mom and how she said her pants were so loose they were practically falling off and I one-upped her by saying mine actually did fall off. Obviously, we both have a flair for the dramatic. However, suddenly I started thinking about all the possible scenarios in which it’s socially acceptable to de-pant in public.

And then I wrote these scenarios down in a draft thinking I would never publish it. And then I decided to Top 8-ify it. And then I decided to publish it because that’s what happens when you have a blog. Things that should probably stay in your head end up on the internet.

So here you go- the list you never knew you wanted:

Top 8 Scenarios It’s Socially Acceptable For Your Pants to Fall Down in Public

8. You’re under the age of 3. There’s only like a few inches between your waist and your knees anyways, so there’s really nowhere for them to go. Plus, faux pas are still perfectly acceptable for those whose age can still be counted in months.

7. Your diet is going swimmingly. Good for you. Buy a belt.

6. You play sports and you wear those pants that snap up on the sides that you rip off when it’s your turn to take the field.

5. You’re a stripper and you wear those pants that snap up on the sides that you rip off when it’s your turn to take the stage.

4. You’re wearing a dress, but live somewhere cold, like oh I dunno Boston for example, where its negative fug-teen degrees when you walk to work in the morning, and so you wear pants under your dress for the commute and take them off when you get to your desk.

3. You’re wearing snow pants. When you take them off, there’s strategically another pair of pants called leggings underneath.

2. You’re Mark “Marky Mark” Wahlberg and it’s 1992.

1. You’re one of those people who considers a locker room a no-pants zone, and you just entered a locker room. Before anyone even has time to avert their eyes, your pants are off, and you’re just walking around all pant-less and junk. Socially acceptable yes, socially advisable, no.

ryan-gosling-locker-room

Do you know those locker room people I’m talking about? Are you one of them?

When was the last time you found yourself pant-less in public?

Does anyone else live in a really cold climate and wear an extra layer of pants to get to work?

Whats your favorite Halloween candy??

Have a happy and safe Halloween!!!

So, my mother is one of my best friends. We have the same sense of humor and the same competitive spirit so our conversations tend to be completely ridiculous, mostly fabricated and, for us, utterly entertaining.

This was our conversation Saturday morning on the phone:

Mom- I’ll be wearing a name tag next time you see me because I’ll be so much younger, thinner and taller I doubt you’ll recognize me.

Me- I’m sure that’s not necessary.

Mom- Oh it is, your step father thought there was an intruder in the house wearing my clothes yesterday.

Me- I’m sure he didn’t think that.

Mom- And it’s all thanks to all the oatmeal I’ve been eating lately.

Me- I eat oatmeal too you know.

Mom- Not as much as I do.

Me- I bet I eat more than you.

Mom- Oh yeah well have you lost 3 lbs like I have?

Me (putting down the cold spaghetti I was eating for breakfast in bed)- I lost 3.5

Mom- Oh did I say 3? I meant 4.

Me (still lying in bed)- Oh did I say 3.5? Well I’m on the scale now and I am literally losing weight as we speak… I am watching it say I’ve now lost 4.4 lbs… 4.5… has your scale ever done that?

Mom- All the time. Have I told you my pants are practically falling off?

Me- Have I told you my pants actually did fall off? It was all sorts of embarrassing and great at the same time.

Mom- (laughing)

Me- (eating more cold spaghetti)

Mom- I have to go eat more oatmeal and pick up name tags, this has been fun. Good bye dear!

Me- (inaudible because I had just taken a huge bite of cold spaghetti)

NOTE: I don’t even own a scale nor have my pants ever fallen off. I’m not sure if my mother is younger, taller and thinner than she was a few months ago- but I’ve seen her pull off harder stunts so, it’s possible.

Are you close with your parents/ children?

In what way would you say you and your mom (or dad) are most similar?

Whats your favorite oatmeal topping(s)?

Hot or cold?

 

So, as everyone knows, it’s fall. (Well, unless you live on the other side of the world, then its not fall. It’s… summer? Spring? I still don’t understand how it works. Like if its 2013 here, is it 2017 there? Something like that :) )

Regardless, I think this post will be relatable for everyone.

As the weather changes, and we slowly move into a cooler climate and shorter days, it’s likely that our activity levels drop. It can sometimes feel overwhelming to keep a fitness schedule throughout the fall & winter. SO, what do we do when we feel overwhelmed? We break it down into simpler steps. Here is a list of things you do in fall that you don’t even realize you’re doing that all contribute to keeping your heart rate up.

Here we go.

Top 8 Ways To Stay Fit This Fall Without Even Trying

8. Refuse to say goodbye to summer and continue to wear your summer clothes a few weeks too long. Shiver violently while adamantly denying you are cold.

7. Finally accept that autumnal clothing is necessary. Bundle up before you leave the house. Then, upon the realization that it’s actually not that bad out in the sun, peel off your layers… A moment later, when the wind picks up, realize that yes, you were right the first time and it is indeed cold out. Put all those layers back on again. Repeat for the duration of the time you spend outside.

6. Technically it’s hurricane season, so if you happen to find yourself in gale-force winds… Run. Like. The Dickens.

5. Apple picking! Treat it like a competition- get all the apples! You may make a bunch of kids pretty unhappy, but you’ll work up a sweat in no time. Trust me.

4. Park in a city. Yeah. You see, urban parking lots are a rare and overpriced thing. So come to the city with the goal to park your car. Drive around for an anxiety-laced hour looking for street parking. Is your heart rate up yet? Good, that’s your warm up. Now walk the mile and a half to your desired destination from the parking spot you found. Once you reach it, pivot and go back because it’s time to refill the meter.

3. Insist that grilling season goes well past Labor Day. Run back and forth from the warmth of your house to the grill on your deck as you check on your food.

2. 3 words: Halloween bar crawl. Do it right and you can cover a lot of ground.

1. Watch football. Be your team’s biggest fan- get a trademark victory dance that would get you penalized for excessive celebration on the spot. Do it often.

chandler-victory-dance

Happy Fall Fitness’ing, friends!

Are you good at keeping up your workout schedule in the fall/ winter?

What football team is your team?

Australians- what is your average temperature this time of year anyways??

 

Hi. What happened?

That was my Olivia Pope impression :) I am so psyched for the Scandal season premiere!! Wait I can do better:

Hi. What happened? Huck?? What. Happened. Here??

If you don’t watch it, I highly suggest it.

Anyways, I’ve been focusing on interviewing recently, so this post wont be very long.

Today in “What To Expect When You’re Job Hunting” I’m going to show you what happens to your diet. And I think this can best be illustrated by showing you the junk in my trunk.

And by “junk” I mean actual garbage and by “trunk”  I mean garbage can.

This is my trash can after working from home the last few days:

trash can

Yep.

Ok fine, that’s a lie, actually this is what it looks like:

trash can 2

I’m not quite sure how this happened. Oh well. While I’m not proud of this, it could be worse. It could be wine bottles instead of Starbucks cups :)

(And I promise I took it all down to the garbage room after I took that photo.)

By the way, has anyone tried the new bakery items at Starbucks? What are your thoughts?

Whats your favorite way to drink coffee?

Or if you don’t like coffee, what’s your favorite drink?