Attention please:

emergency broadcast system

We interrupt this regularly scheduled blog post to bring you breaking news that Charlotte has a whopping case of Writer’s Block.

She tries to form sentences:

  • Attempt 1: Protein bars are…
  • Attempt 2: Have you ever noticed when you’re 90% through your workout and…
  • Attempt 3: Whats the deal with…

But inevitably falls short. Upon attempting to write an even mildly amusing post she…

please stand by

…she realizes all attempts are futile until her Writer’s Block is cured and the muse returns.

The public is advised to be on high alert. The amazing Meghan also posted about her Writer’s Block all of 24 hours ago, leading imaginary internet doctors to speculate it could be spreading.

If you or somebody you love is suffering from:

  • Inability to come up with ideas worth their weight in salt
  • Resignation to the fact that “nothing good is going up on the blog tomorrow”
  • Lack of focus, attention to detail and an answer to the question “what exactly do you bring to the table?”

Then you may already be infected with Writer’s Block. If this is the case, you are highly encouraged to get outdoors, do something new, or read a book.

If symptoms do not dissipate soon, email Charlotte and you can commiserate together.

 

We now return to your regularly scheduled questioning:

What do you do when you can’t write?

Whats worse– posting something bad or not posting anything at all?

From where do you draw your inspiration?

 

So for today’s Thinking Out Loud, I’m opening up my Notes App.

Thinking-Out-Loud2

My Notes App is where I write down my blog ideas. I then transfer these ideas into drafts that may or may not ever see the light of day. Every idea listed here today was originally a concept for its own post that I have yet to expand upon. 

So, this is either a teaser post for whats to come, or it’s where ideas go to die a somewhat respectful death.

Let’s brainstorm together! Here we go.

8. Unfinished Idea: I don’t think it’s a mistake the word “Wine” has the word “Win” in it.

Accompanying Notes:

drinking wine and judging people

 

7. Unfinished Idea: Is it Bar or Barre?

Accompanying Notes: Both! While it’s mostly called barre, the type I follow is called Bar Method.

 

6. Unfinished Idea: You know how your phone gives you auto-text options like “Call you later” or “I am away”? Snoresville. I would like a famous author edition keyboard that makes me sound interesting at the touch of a button.

Accompanying Notes: For example: The Shel Silverstein keyboard would go something like:

Text from Friend: “Hey”

Text from Me (auto away message): “And there were green alligators, and long neck geese, some humpty-backed camels and talk later. Peace.”

 

4 & 5. Unfinished Idea: And now let’s play “Who Said It: Hipster Chloe Sevigny or My Dad?”

Accompanying NotesBecause amazingly, hipsters and dads are remarkably similar.

1. Quote: “I don’t even have an iPhone yet. I have a BlackBerry.
(Answer: Hipster Chloe Sevigny. My dad would never say “yet”)

2. Quote: “I had an appointment at the Apple store to fix my 15-year-old laptop.”
(Answer: Hipster Chloe Sevigny. If you guessed my dad, you were so close, but my dad’s 15-yr-old computer is a desktop)

3. Quote: “You see these kids walking on the street and think, ‘Oh, look at that Goth kid’”
(Answer: Hipster Chloe Sevigny. Although she was saying it in a nice “Oh look at that Goth kid!” kind of way, while my dad would’ve said in a  “Oh, look at that Goth kid… it’s a shame nobody enrolled him in sports as a kid” kind of way.)

This concludes “Who Said It: Hipster Chloe Sevigny or My Dad?”

 

3. Unfinished Idea: Primal eating is going awesomely.

Accompanying Notes: I’d say I’m about 85% percent Primal (which counts!) Some benefits: I now prefer the taste of natural food and I call said food by its flavor rather than its color. Although I’ll admit I’ve been living on red wine and dark chocolate lately, so maybe that 2nd benefit was a lie.

 

2. Unfinished Idea: Barre problems

Accompanying Notes:

barre wedgie post it

 

1. Unfinished Idea: Acronyms

Accompanying Notes: Barre: Build A Resilient Rear End

Etc, etc.

Questions:

Would you like to see any of the above ideas expanded upon?

What famous author (or realty TV personality) would you like for your auto-text keyboard?

Where do you keep track of your blog ideas? (Anybody else keep track on the go?)

How many drafts are you hoarding? (I have so many it might justify an intervention)

What’s an idea you just can’t seem to finish?

Are you sick of questions yet?

 

In exercise we are always trying to go up — sit ups, push ups, pull ups, etc. However this seems to go against the natural human condition of wanting to go down — sit down, lie down, calm down, etc.

Perhaps this is why so many people are so opposed to exercise. It’s a mere issue of lexicon.

I hereby suggest that we change the lingo. CrossFit seems to have done a great job of that, however it’s all really intense and acronymy and quite frankly it scares people.

Examples:

  • Power snatch
  • Pistol
  • Push jerk
  • Sumo Deadlift High Pull

I propose something less awesome: the jargon equivalent of the doctor asking you a question then giving you a shot before you realize whats happening. It’s sneaky, but it’s for your health so it’s okay.

downton abby maggie smith reassuring

Thus, in the name of health, I’ve taken the liberty of thinking up a few name changes:

1. Sit Ups are now: Lie Back Downs.
Sure, there’s the part you have to sit up, but let’s focus on the part you get to go with gravity.

2. Push Ups are now: Where’s That Smell Coming Froms.
As in, where is that smell coming from? Is it the carpet? Lower yourself down… gross, now come back up. Wait, is it the carpet? Double check. Repeat 10 times.

3. Burpees are now: Air Raid! Just Kidding We’re All Going to Live Hoorays!
Hoorays!

4. Pull Ups are now: Peekaboos.
Or, if you’re like me, Hang Theres.

5. High Knees are now: OMG a Mouses.
And if you were in my apartment six months ago, it would not have been a drill.

6. Medicine Balls are now: Gum Balls.
Nobody likes medicine. Almost everybody loves gum!

7. Dumbbells are now: Smartbells.
Ding!

8. Deadlifts are now: Grateful Deadlifts.
“More fun than a frog in a glass of milk!” 

9. Suicides are now:  Be Right Backs.
Because you will indeed be right back, over, and over, and over again.

10. Planks are now: Original Hardwood Floorings.
Because the point of the exercise is to be stiff like wood… and this is a classy blog. 

So that’s what I think we should do.

Questions:

Can you think of any other horribly named exercises that should be renamed?

What’s your favorite workout move? Least favorite?

Favorite part of the body to work out? Least favorite?

 

Hello! Happy Thursday. This week I’m doing another Socrates post. The last one was sort of fitnessy, so this one focuses more on food.

Thinking-Out-Loud2

I guess it goes without saying I’ve been thinking a lot about food lately 😀

Here we go.

Top 8 Food Quotes:

8. On lunch:

james earl jones words in your heart you cant utter

 

7. On swag:

teaching by example

 

6. On lactose intolerance:

socrates one good one evil

 

5. On Paleo/Primal: wilde be yourself everyone else is taken

 

4. On Oatmeal:

coolidge force of an ideal

 

3. On cereal: socrates envy is the ulcer of the soul

 

2. On priorities:

socrates beautiful within

 

1. On appetites:

spinoza understand their nature

 

Bonus 1. On cooking:

socrates can only make them think

 

I did nine images instead of eight this week because I felt like I owed you after last week :)

Thanks Amanda, TOL is quickly becoming my favorite day of the week!

Questions:

What’s your favorite food? (This week? Anything with bananas!)

What do you find yourself cooking most often? (Teach me!)

What’s your drink? (Red wine and grapefruit mimosas 😀 )